Standing Together

Standing Together

Before I delve into my beliefs on the power of everyone, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race, age, socioeconomic status, religion, and more, standing together, I would like to note that I understand that not everyone identifies as a man or a woman. This blog makes some generalizations but for the sake of saving my words, I digress.

I’ve always been a guys’ girl. My whole life, it’s been easier for me to be friends with boys than girls and as I’ve gotten older that has become increasingly true. I have found myself with more male friends than female friends and closer friendships at that. I’m not sure why this is, but this sentiment has taught me about the power in a true male-female balance, and has shown me that when men and women work together, great things can happen.

There are generalizations about both men and women that seem to be relatively true. A Psychology Today article entitled “Brain Differences Between Genders” points out several of these differences. The most notable is that it is part of a woman’s nature to be concerned about the feelings of the people around her, due in part to a larger hippocampus, much more so than it is part of a man’s nature. Women are also able to, according to the article, move from task to task more quickly and multitask more effectively than men, whereas men thrive in focusing on one specific task. The combination of specialized thought and lack of concern for others might explain why men are more likely to fight to the top of the corporate ladder than women. However, a world that lacks emotional attachment and deep, contemplative thought is lacking, and that is where we really, really need female leaders. Women know that they can be powerful, incredible leaders. They are aware they possess the skills and insight to move the world forward. Now, we need men to join us.

While the number of female Fortune 500 CEOs is up to 24, the highest it has ever been, 95.2% of these companies are still run by men. That’s 476 men that have a huge global impact that could look to women for a more balanced work force. If those men made the push for equal pay for women, children and families would live in a better world. If these men, and all men, stood beside women, we can make big steps forward in other areas by combining our skills, perspectives and brain-power. A world where men and women stand together instead of against each other is a world where we can make great progress.

A Woman’s Confidence Is True Beauty

A Woman’s Confidence Is True Beauty

It all comes down to jealously. When women let other women tear them down based on looks, achievements, or anything in between, it will always come back to how they wish they could be more like someone else. Well, no one ever said that you have to dress, act, or be a certain way in order to gain success. The only way to truly to be happy and have control of your life is to be yourself.

Do not compare yourself to anyone else because there’s only one you. In today’s society there is so much pressure to be something that we are not, especially for us young women. The ads shown in magazines and all over the media have unrealistic models (most likely Photo Shopped) to sell their brands. These images are ones that women aspire to be, but the reality of it is, no one looks like that, not even the models in the pictures. These images that are fed to us just adds to insecurities that women already have every day. Even going to work can become a best-dressed competition.

I feel that the best way to push all of the confidence issues aside is to become more positive when it comes to other women. Do not let the little things get to you. Instead of letting the negative thoughts bottle up in your mind about how you wish you could fit into that dress, or how you wish you could be more personable, speak up in a positive way. Next time you see a woman in a nice outfit, compliment her sincerely on it to show her your confident. You will feel good about yourself and you can feel good about others that may have made you upset if you let them get to you. A woman’s most beautiful attribute is her confident. Without having a sense of self worth and independence, you will become weak and that is when others can get you when you’re down.

Be proud of who you are and where you came from. We all have our own story, and chances are you have worked really hard to make it to where you are now. So why waste your time letting others get you down? Women have already come so far within the work place, and we should be proud of each other, not jealous. We need to continue to send a positive message to the youth, and motivate them to continue the path of gender equality. Whenever you feel yourself start to stray, remember to not compare yourself to others, and be comfortable in your own skin.

Broken trusts and broken hearts

Broken trusts and broken hearts

While flipping through the pages of a book my eyes glued to one statement that read, “I dont hate you. I’m just disappointed you turned into everything you said you would never be”. This line might seem an ordinary one but when you excavate deep into the meanings you realize it portrays the pain, betrayal, bleeds and despair of a broken heart. Trust takes years to build, seconds to break and forever to repair. In cases of Acquaintance rape and Date rape the trust factor loses its value forever.

In both the cases the perpetrator is not a complete stranger to the survivor and this is the probable reason why most of the rape survivors find it extremely difficult to even identify the horrific experience that they had to go through. The proximity of the relationship also plays a key role as closer the relationship with the perpetrator the greater is the survivor’s shock. Self-blame is yet another recurring response from the survivors leading into non-disclosure of the incident. If this is struggle is not enough, the survivors have to deal with physical, emotional and psychological burdens of betrayal and fear of the encountering their perpetrator in future.Most of the victims find this betrayal of trust hard to believe and end up mistrusting others in life.

No one deserves to be raped. If a guy is spending on a gift or an expensive dinner for a woman, it does not mean she is under an implied obligation to payback to him by having sex. A woman’s dress is not her consent to have sex. Likewise it is difficult to understand who the rapists are. Rapists do not come with a chit (bearing their intention to rape) on their respective foreheads. The responsibility of both the men and the women is Prevention. Stigmatizing the victims is the readily available defense for the rapists. Detecting a person who will rape is difficult. A few characteristics can be a sign of trouble. Emotional intimidation through belittling comments, sulking, projecting coercive tendencies, inability to handle sexual and emotional frustration, physical intimidation by blocking doorway or physical startling, extreme drinking can serve as a warning. Awareness is the key and can accelerate quick decision making during problematic situations.

I shall conclude my article with a beautiful quote by George Macdonald that states “To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved”. This is universally applicable to both men and women.