Doing What’s Best For Your Relationship With A Survivor by blogger Dana

Let’s begin by saying I do not speak for all survivors. Each individual is different. Each survivor has different things that they are comfortable/uncomfortable with. With that being said, there two basic things that the partner of a survivor can do to be the most supportive partner they can be.

First: Communication! Communication is key when it comes to having an intimate relationship with anyone, but it is essential in a relationship with a survivor. This does not mean your partner needs to speak up; this simply means if your partner wants to talk, be open to discussion. If your partner is not ready or does not want to open up, they have already nonverbally communicated to you that they are uncomfortable. So long as there is always an open dialogue about what both of you are comfortable with in any situation, then your communication is already off to a good start.

The next most important is being understanding. There will be times when you are partner may get unexplainably irritable or reserved. There may be times that they just need their space. Be understanding. Give them that space. This is not about you or anything you have done. They just need time. On the other hand, maybe your partner really needs you. The best you can do for them is to be there. Give them the support that they need. Sometimes, even just being present is more than enough. Having the right mindset of always trying to be understanding and helpful is so important to your relationship with a survivor.

There is obviously so much more that a person can do for their partner who is a survivor, but that’s not up to me to tell you. By taking this piece of advice, go to your partner and find out what works best for both of you. With communication and understanding the two of you will come up with a system for you that I could never tell you. Every single person is unique. Every single relationship is unique.