#metoo
A popular hashtag that has graced many of our social media feeds.
Contrary to common knowledge, the Me Too Movement has existed for over a decade to help women of color, specifically Black women and girls, heal from sexual violence.
I am guilty of being ignorant about the movement; I thought it I thought its origin began 2-3 years ago to bring awareness about women who experienced sexual harassment in the entertainment industry.
With sensitive male egos running around, many assume that the Me Too Movement is about attacking powerful men. First off, wrong is wrong and violence is violence. If you do not want to get in trouble, do not commit the crime. Secondly, the fact that the focus has even slightly shifted from healing and sharing stories of survivors to protecting men only on validates the importance of the movement.
Even though Me Too has elevated as a movenment, unfornately sexual violence, specifically in sexual violence the workplace, still exists.
According to a recent article published by reuters.com in December 2019, 10 million people in the U.S. have experienced sexual violence in the workplace, approximately 1 in 18 women and 1 in 40 men. Less than 6% reported the perpetrator(s).
The article also stated that contrary to popular belief, work place sexual violence is not as common with bosses as much as co-workers and clients/customers. Many nurses, psychiatrists, emergency workers, etc. experience unwanted sexual advances and are put in awkward situations because they are trained to prioritize treating the patients vs. their own well being.
From personal experience, while it is very flattering to receive a genuine compliment, (if you are lucky enough to receive a classy compliment vs. something sleazy) it is very frustrating being a woman trying to conduct business with men. As someone who works in the direct sales industry, I avoid trying to partner with or sell to men, because more times than not, they do not buy, but make it a priority to bring sex/my beauty into the conversation.
One question that irks me is when ask, almost in a hopeless, defeated away, about approaching/ dating women in the workplace.
Here are a list of suggestions:
- Don’t
There are plenty of women in the world to meet. Find other ways to meet people. If you only interact with women at work, then that is evidence that you need new hobbies.
- Only Talk About Work
If you feel inclined, do not begin your relationship/connection sexual compliments whatsoever or drawing attention to their body. I use to work with someone who was known for being mannish, flirting with women co-workers, eyeing their bodies when they were not looking, etc. Keep the conversations and compliments work based. “Wow, you did a really good job presenting the project, Karen.” “Congratulations Tasha on getting the highest sales this week.”
- Meeting Outside Of The Workplace
If you invite her out, make sure it is a group setting where multiple co-workers will be present and keep things platonic as possible. Also, avoid alcohol; it will lead to nothing good.
Ending sexual violence in the workplace is a cause that is going to require us to work together to fight. It will require openness, education, and awareness from everyone, but only the survivors.
For those who are new to the #MeToo Movement or have little to no knowledge about it, I would encourage you to visit https://metoomvmt.org/, watch some interviews with Tanara Burke, the founder of the Me Too movement, and research the hashtag #metoomovement. In addition, outside of the hashtag, I would use social media to research tweets on Twitter (or screenshots of tweets on Instagram) to learn stories of survivors. These stories will create a clearer understanding and put a person to a story.